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-   -   Smoking, childcare, and ruining one's relationship with a threesome (http://zelaron.com/forum/showthread.php?t=42177)

klo 2007-04-16 12:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Willkillforfood
Yea. Big red flag.

To Klo: He's probably cheated on you many times. I mean, he seems to constantly be trying to get ass. I'd say for every time you've found out about him being with another woman he's been with 3 you didn't find out. Probably even worse.

The funny thing is how blunt he was when you did find out. Taking the girl to your house even. I mean, do you not think they fucked around when he lost you? =p

I know they didn't because when the police pulled him over she wasn't with him. I can't really remember, but I don't think that we were "together" at that time, I wasn't stayin at our apt most the time.

Vollstrecker 2007-04-16 04:36 PM

Honestly, there's a few things to be said about this kind of thing. First off, I never really bought into the "open relationship" thing as it's basically an overglorified "fuckbuddy" to me, someone you can fall back on as you experiment or look for someone you like better. It's a comfort zone thing.

The next is about honest relationships. Jokingly pursuing or admiring other women doesn't exactly mean that they're liable to be unfaithful. Some people don't really believe in the overly advertised "Romantic Love", and may desire other people in addition to their partner. What shows you that they love you is their refraining from doing so.

Willkillforfood 2007-04-16 06:42 PM

If you really love someone, I really feel it must be very hard to do an open relationship. Well, that's if you find sex to be the most intimate of things.

KagomJack 2007-04-17 12:35 AM

Which is my sentiments to sex. I don't mind playing with other so long as the other person is around with me, but one-on-one is usually an intimate thing.

Volls: I agree with you. It IS like an overglorified fuckbuddy. I think open relationships are equivalent to being able to cheat, but with permission, so to speak.

This is quite a different topic from smoking and with children around.

!King_Amazon! 2007-04-17 07:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KagomJack
Which is my sentiments to sex. I don't mind playing with other so long as the other person is around with me, but one-on-one is usually an intimate thing.

Volls: I agree with you. It IS like an overglorified fuckbuddy. I think open relationships are equivalent to being able to cheat, but with permission, so to speak.

This is quite a different topic from smoking and with children around.

Bringing another person in bed with you and your significant other is commiting relationship suicide.

klo 2007-04-17 08:59 AM

yea, im not really into the whole "open-relationship" thing either. His dad has always been with a lot of women, but I'm pretty sure he understands that if he wants to see other women then we'll work it out to where he'll move out and he'll just help me pay the bills....but you never know how that would really work...

Jessifer 2007-04-17 01:49 PM

For the most part it is, but imo that depends on how confident and comfortable you are in your relationship. I'm all for being sexually adventurous, but not if the other person in the relationship is uncomfortable with it, or if that person isn't there at all and there's another party involved.

klo 2007-04-17 02:00 PM

I dont think i could ever involve another girl. I would end up either fighting or crying and fighting. :(. One time a few years ago kaneda and I weren't talking and he didn't know I was working in the movie theater and he brought his g/f there and at the time I had never felt so sick in my life. I couldn't breath it hurt so bad.

Grav 2007-04-17 02:02 PM

"A few years ago" how long have you been involved with this schmuck?

!King_Amazon! 2007-04-17 02:05 PM

Jealousy is what makes it impossible.

I just don't see how a truly loving relationship between two people can involve a third person without having some serious trouble.

Thanatos 2007-04-17 02:09 PM

It can't, unless you're having a 3some. If your girl is down for it, then there shouldn't be any problems. Just pay more attention to your woman then the other girl. ;)

!King_Amazon! 2007-04-17 02:13 PM

So you're telling me if I go tell Nikki I want to have another woman in bed with us and she says yes, if I do it there won't be problems later?

Women rarely say what they mean. If anything she would just do it for me, and it would end up ruining our relationship.

klo 2007-04-17 02:29 PM

fuck yea it would. NO WAY could i be with someone after watching them fuck someone else. ugh, hell no.

didn't i already say we've been dating off/on for 5 years in september.

Willkillforfood 2007-04-17 02:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jessifer
For the most part it is, but imo that depends on how confident and comfortable you are in your relationship. I'm all for being sexually adventurous, but not if the other person in the relationship is uncomfortable with it, or if that person isn't there at all and there's another party involved.

Jessifer, ride em hard cowgirl.

Thanatos 2007-04-17 02:41 PM

Maybe the only situation in which it would be okay is if she approached you about the subject.

!King_Amazon! 2007-04-17 02:43 PM

Approached me about a guy or about a girl?

About a guy, the answer would be no.

About a girl, the answer would be no.

I would be either weirded out or offended at either suggestion.

Jessifer 2007-04-17 02:53 PM

Actually, I really doubt that I myself would ever be truely willing to participate in a threesome.

Thanatos 2007-04-17 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jessifer
Actually, I really doubt that I myself would ever be truely willing to participate in a threesome.

Why? It's a blast.

!King_Amazon! 2007-04-17 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thanatos
Why? It's a blast.

I'm not doubting that a threesome would be a ton of fun, and I'm not saying they can't happen without problems, just not with someone you love.

If it's just you and a couple fuckbuddies, who cares. Have a blast.

KagomJack 2007-04-22 07:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by !King_Amazon!
Bringing another person in bed with you and your significant other is commiting relationship suicide.

I don't think group experimentation will kill a relationship, but I think enough one-on-one encounters without the other person will, especially when one person has paranoia and trust issues to begin with.


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