"Blame Canda. Blame Canada!"

Not exactly from a movie, but I love this.

Well, like with our slang. Black people always used to say, "I'm in the house" instead of "I'm here." But then white people all started to say "in the house" so we switched it to "in the hizzouse." Hizzouse became hizzizzouse, and then white folk started saying that, and we had to change it to hizzie, then "in the hizzle" which we had to change to "hizzle fo shizzle," and now, because white people say "hizzle fo shizzle," we have to say "flippity floppity floop."

-chef; south park

Mr. Garrison: Come awn Mr. Slave, let's head back to our Flippity Floppity Floop!

Chef: Aw, dammit! Don't say that!

Donnie Darko

Cherita- Chut up!
Friend- Go back to China, bitch.

I never found Cherita's involvement in the movie to be as humorous as most people did. I always felt really sorry for her.

Same thing with Gollum from Two Towers. Everyone in the audience was laughing at the scene where he was arguing with himself, and it wasn't intended to be humorous. It was supposed to be painful, but because he's an animated side-character, that automatically means everything he does is intended for comedic relief? I applied the same thing to Cherita.

Well, I kinda felt sorry for her too, I just chuckle whenever she says "Chut up". Mostly becuase of a funny forum picture I saw.


Anywho, heres another good quote

True lies:

"I come home one day, and the house is completely empty...I mean COMPLETELY empty. She even took the ice-cube trays out of the freezer. What sick bitch takes the ice-cube trays out of the freezer?!

blah
 

i like when smeagle from LOTR the two towers says"It's mine it came to me!"

Don't get me wrong, I love weed. I LOVE IT! But not as much as I love pussy.
-Thurgood, Half Baked

You guys gotta get me out of here! There's this guy Nasty Nate who wants my cocktail fruit, and everyone here likes fresh fish! Then The Squirrel Master came out of left field and told me I'm his bitch!
-Kenny Davis, Half baked

Scarface: Don't worry, man. All we gotta do to get you out is to get ten percent of ten million dollars. Which by our calculations is...
Brian: ...Fucking impossible, man!
-Half Baked

I don't do drugs, though. Just weed.
-Thurgood, Half Baked

In eleven days I'm as good as skewered! Ever take your clothes off and run backwards through a cornfield?
-Kenny Davis, Half Baked

There are three things that Black people need to tell the truth about. Number one: Rodney King should've gotten his ass beat for being drunk in a Honda a white part of Los Angeles. Number two: O.J. did it! And number three: Rosa Parks didn't do nuthin' but sit her Black ass down!
-Eddie, Barbershop

See, in my day, a barber was more than just somebody who sit around in a FUBU shirt with his drawers hanging all out. In my day, a barber was a counselor. He was a fashion expert. A style coach. Pimp. Just general all-around hustler. But the problem with y'all cats today, is that you got no skill. No sense of history. And then, with a straight face, got the nerve to want to be somebody. Want somebody to respect you. But it takes respect to get respect. Understand? See, I'm old. But, Lord willing, I'd be spared the sight of seeing everything that we worked for flushed down the drain by someone who don't know no better or care.
-Eddie, Barbershop

This ain't no Goddamn school of the blind, Calvin! This is the barbershop! The place where a black man means something! Cornerstone of the neighborhood! Our own country club! I mean, can't you see that? Hell, that's the problem with your whole generation. You know, y'all... you don't believe in nothin'. But your father, he believed in something, Calvin. He believed and understood that something as simple as a little haircut could change the way a man felt on the inside.
-Eddie, Barbershop

Boy, look, look! Look! Your daddy may not had a whole lot of money. Oh, but he was rich, because he invested in people. What'd you think? You think I was the only one he gave a job to, Calvin? No! That man opened up the doors to anybody and any knucklehead around here in the city of Chicago that wanted to come down here and make somebody out themselves. Gave the opportunity to be somebody! A licensed professional barber. Now, me, myself, personally... I wouldn't gave half these bail-jumpers the opportunity. But, you know, it's just hard enough. You sit in there and try to cut somebody's head and gotta worry about this fool over there trying to shank you. But let me tell you somethin'. At the end of the day... the end of the day, I was glad I was here.
-Eddie, Barbershop

For one brief embarrassing moment, I chose to give up. But your words were just the reminder I needed. Perhaps insignificant to you, but sometimes I think we're unaware of how the little things for us can be so huge for others.
-Samir, Barbershop

Boy: [to Jimmy] You cut a patch in my head!
Eddie: Shane, look over there! He cut a patch in the li'l boy head; got him lookin' like "101 Dalmatians." You ever heard a' that movie? He look like a Dalmatian! That's one hundred an' two!
-Barbershop

Ricky: We don't need reparations! We need restraint!
Billy: "Restraint"?
Ricky: "Restraint"! Some discipline! Don't go out and buy a Range Rover when you livin' with your mama! And pay your mama some rent! And can we please, please, *please* try and teach our kids something other than the "Chronic" album? And *please*, Black people, try and be on time for something other than free before eleven at the club!
-Barbershop

Paul Edgecomb: On the day of my judgment, when I stand before God, and He asks me why did I kill one of his true miracles, what am I gonna say? That is was my job? My job?
John Coffey: You tell God the Father it was a kindness you done. I know you hurtin' and worryin', I can feel it on you, but you oughta quit on it now. Because I want it over and done. I do. I'm tired, boss. Tired of bein' on the road, lonely as a sparrow in the rain. Tired of not ever having me a buddy to be with, or tell me where we's coming from or going to, or why. Mostly I'm tired of people being ugly to each other. I'm tired of all the pain I feel and hear in the world everyday. There's too much of it. It's like pieces of glass in my head all the time. Can you understand?
Paul Edgecomb: Yes, John. I think I can.
-The Green Mile

Arlen Bitterbuck: Do you believe that if a man repents enough for what he done wrong, than he'll get to go back to the time that was happiest for him and live there forever? Could that be what heaven's like?
Paul Edgecomb: I just about believe that very thing.
Arlen Bitterbuck: I had a young wife when I was eighteen. We spent the summer in the mountains, made love every night. After we would talk sometimes till the sun came up, and she'd lay there, bare breasted in the fire light... that was my best time.
-The Green Mile

Whenever I despair, I remember that the way of truth and love has always won. There may be tyrants and murderers, and for a time, they may seem invincible, but in the end, they always fail. Think of it: always.
-Gandhi, Gandhi

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind.
-Gandhi, Gandhi

I AM NOT GOING TO BURY MY SON! MY SON IS GOING TO BURY ME!
-John Q, John Q

My son is dieing, and I'm broke. If I don't qualify for Medicare, WHO THE HELL DOES?
-John Q, John Q

I would tell you what I think of you, but I am a Christian woman.
-Denise, John Q

It's not what's in a kid's backpack that makes him dangerous, it's what's in his heart.
-Val, Bang Bang You're Dead

From I'm Gonna Git You Sucka!

Chris Rock: I jus' want one rib!

This thread still hasn't died....?


"Misa making you combat general."

I can't believe I forgot this:

Terrance: Shut your fucking face uncle fucka
You're a cock sucking ass licking uncle fucka
You're an uncle fucka, yes its true
Nobody fucks uncles quite like you

Phillip: Shut your fucking face uncle fucka
You're the one that fucked your uncle, uncle fucka
You dont eat or sleep or mow the lawn,
You just fuck your uncle all day long

(farting noises)
Terrance: Hmm!
(farting noises)
(laughing)
(farting noises)
Some Guy: What's going on here?
(farting noises)
People: OOOoooooooooooooh
Fucker fucker uncle fucka uncle fucka fucka fucka fucka
T & P: Shut your fucking face uncle fucka (Terrance: uncle fucka)

Terrance: You're a boner biting bastard uncle fucka
Phillip: You're an uncle fucka I must say
Terrance: Well you fucked your uncle yesterday
Everyone: (laughing)
People: Uncle fucka... thats
Everyone: U-N-C-L-E fuck you Uncle
Fuckaaaaaa tonight...

Phillip: Suck my balls!

a great adventure is waiting for you ahead
hurry onward Lemmiwinks or you will soon be dead
teh journey before you may be long and filled with woahs
but you must escape the gay man's ass or your tale cant be told

Lemmiwinks (x4)

Lemmiwinks journey a distance far and fast
to find a wayout of a gay man's ass
the road ahead is filled with danger and fright
but push onward Lemmiwinks with all of you might

TALKING:
Lemmiwinks you are coming to the entrance of the small intestant
there you must seek out the sparrow prince

the sparrow prince lies somewhere way up ahead
dont look back Lemmiwinks or youll soon be dead
Lemmiwinks Lemmiwinks the time is growing late
slow down now and seal your fate

SPARROW PRINCE:
i am the sparrow prince
long has my spirit been trapped in this place
before you lies the maze of the small intestants
one path leads to te stomach the other to certain doom
take with you this helmet and torch
let them be your guide

take the magic helmet torch to help you light the way
theres still alot of ground to cross inside the man so gay
ahead of you lies adventure and your strength still lies within
freedom from the ass of doom is the treasure you will win

Lemmiwinks came to the stomach god
beneath the depths of the lungs and heart

CATATAFISH:
you chose your path wisely Lemmiwinks
i am the catatafish

Catatafish of the stomach's cove

CATATAFISH:
if you answer this riddle the esophagas will let you pass

catatafish's riddle will soon be told

TALKING:
hang on Lemmiwinks
you solved the catatafish's riddle
now your trials are nearly through

Lemmiwinks has made it out
the tale is nearly through

great job Lemmiwinks

thanks to you we are all free

but your adventures are just begining
for you are no ordinary gerbil Lemmiwinks
you are the gerbil king

ALL HAIL THE GERBIL KING

now the ger the gerbil king has more adventures to go on
fly away to faraway lands into the setting sun
theres still so many enemies and battles yet to fight
for Lemmiwinks the gerbil king is to be told another night

le-lemmiwinks le-le-lemmiwins le-lemmiwinks
lemmiwinks lemmiwinks lemmiwinks (x2)

gerbil king

ahh dude dude jesus christ ahh

I couldn't imagine if this wasn't already posted, and I'm not about to go through all 100 or so posts to find out. Either way, it deserves a double posting, if that is the case:

Wallace: Sons of Scotland! I am William Wallace!

Scotsman: William Wallace is seven feet tall!

Wallace: Yes, I've heard! Kills men by the hundreds! And if he were here, he'd consume the English with fireballs from his eyes...and bolts of lightning from his arse! (laughter) I AM William Wallace! And I see, a whole army of my countrymen, here in defiance of tyranny. You've come to fight as free men, and free men you are. What will you do with that freedom? Will you fight?

Scotsman: Fight? Against that? No, we will run, and we will live.

Wallace: Aye, fight and you may die. Run, and you'll live. At least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that...for one chance...just ONE CHANCE to come back here to tell our enemy that they may take out lives, but they will never take OUR FREEDOM!!!"

From Sports Night

Isaac: And may I repeat, Dana, that things I say in my office stay in my office!

Dana: Natalie is my second in command, she's the only person I told!

Natalie: Jeremy is my boyfriend, he's the only person I told!

Jeremy: I told many, many people.

Sports Night is a television show.

Your point? MJ has been posting South Park quotes all over the place.

And on that note, more Sports Night quotes!

Dan Rydell: I will not be the subject of your mockery.
Casey McCall: Oh, I think you shall.

Dan Rydell: What are you, nuts? Are you just some... nutty-nut girl who's nuts?

Dan Rydell: [on the air] We'll bring you the thrill of victory, the agony of defeat-and, because we've got soccer highlights, the sheer pointlessness of a zero-zero tie.

Dan Rydell: You're nineteen feet tall, why are you wearing heels?
Sally Sasser: Do you feel diminutive?
Dan Rydell: No, but now I have to look up that word.

[After Casey makes a presentation for his son's class]
Natalie: What did you do for the presentation?
Casey McCall: I did what I do, Natalie. I did what I do.
Dan Rydell: You screwed up your romantic life in front of fifth-graders?

You see Billy it's like this, you either smoke or you get smoked. And you got smoked.
-Sidney, White Men Can't Jump

You can put a cat in an oven, but that don't make it a biscuit.
-Sidney, White Men Can't Jump

Oh man shut your anorexic malnutrition tapeworm-having overdose on Dick Gregory Bohemian diet-drinking ass up. Leave me alone!
-Sidney, White Men Can't Jump

Billy Hoyle: My name ain't chump, it's Billy Hoyle.
Sidney Deane: Billy Hoyle. BILLY HOYLE. Billy Hoyle. Okay Billy... can you count to ten, Billy?
Billy Hoyle: Yeah.
Sidney Deane: Good. What's the score... Billy?
Billy Hoyle: I don't know.
Sidney Deane: Then you're a chump.
Billy Hoyle: I may be a chump, I just said that wasn't my name.

Billy, listen to me. White men can't jump.
-Sidney, White Men Can't Jump

You are so stupid. It would take your mother 1, no. 2 hours to watch 60 MINUTES.
-Billy; White Men Can't Jump

Billy Hoyle: You calling me ugly?
Sidney Deane: Your mother did.

I'll tell you what. Why don't we take all these bricks and build a shelter for the homeless, so maybe your mother will have a place to stay.
-Billy; White Men Can't Jump

Sidney Deane: Billy, I have four words for you: "Listen to the Woman".
Billy Hoyle: What the hell does that mean, "Listen to the woman"? I TRIED to listen to the woman and you're the one who talked me out of it.
Sidney Deane: Wait a minute. I didn't talk you out of anything. I presented you with an option and you took it.

I never told you, but you sound a little like Dr. Seuss when you're drunk.
-Anna; Sixth Sense

I see dead people.
-Cole; Sixth Sense

This was a fucking BADASS line... It is from one of my favorite characters of all time (Beatrix in the Kill Bill series) in Kill Bill Volume 2.

Elle, the patch eyed arch enemy of Beatrice, stares her down with sword in hand.
Elle:"I killed your master, and now I am going to kill you with your own sword... Which will belong to me in the immediate future."
Beatrix: "Bitch, you don't have a future."

It's Beatrix, not Beatrice.

You win, still a godly quote though.