Zelaron Gaming Forum - Joke - Have Faith in the Lord

Here's a joke I heard a few days ago. Thought it was good, so I'm going to share it. Enjoy!

---

We're in a church in one of the bible belt states of America. The preacher is stood on a podium, arms outstretched, leading the congregation through a vigorous song-and-dance routine.

"Children of the Lord!" he cries, "Children of the Lord! We have with us today, a young man, crippled since birth. Today, this young man, will be HEALED, through his faith in the Lord! Charlie! Charlie! Come to me, Charlie!"

A clacking is heard over the music, and a young man stumbles down the aisle, a crutch on each arm.

"Charlie!" the preacher bellows, "Charlie! Do you believe in the Lord?!"

"I do!" replies Charlie.

"Charlie!" the preacher returns, "Charlie! Do you believe in the healing powers of the Lord?!"

"I do!" Charlie shouts back at him.

"Charlie!" the preacher replies, "Charlie! Go behind that screen over there and pray! The healing powers of the Lord will heal you!"

Around the two, the congregation continue to sing and dance, hands and fingers shaking in the air; "Oh happy days!

“Children of the Lord!” the preacher cries again, “Children of the Lord! We also have with us a young man with a terrible speech impediment! This young man, too, will be HEALED, through his faith in the Lord! Thomas, my son, come up here, Thomas!”

A young man detaches himself from the congregation and strides up to the preacher.

“Here I am, tharther!” he lisps.

“Thomas!” the preacher bellow, “Thomas! Do you believe in the Lord?!”

“Yeth I do!” replies Thomas.

“Thomas!” the preacher returns, “Thomas! Do you believe in the healing powers of the Lord?!”

“Yeth tharther!” Thomas shouts back, “I beliethe in the healing powerth oth the Lord!”

"Thomas!" the preacher replies, "Thomas! Go behind that screen and pray! The healing powers of the Lord will heal you!"

The congregation continue to sing and dance, hands and fingers shaking in the air, as Thomas walks over to the screen; "Oh happy days!

“Children of the Lord! Pray with me! Let us pray to the Lord to heal these two men! Hear us Lord!”

The congregation hold their hands to the air, raise their heads and repeat the words of the preacher.

“Charlie!” the preacher shouts, “Throw away your crutches, Charlie! The Lord has healed you!” A crutch soars over the top of the screen, followed closely by the second.

“Thomas!” the preacher shouts, “Your tongue has been healed by the Lord, Thomas! You can now speak normally! Thomas! Say something, Thomas!”

From behind the screen comes a voice, “Tharther, Tharlie’th thallen other.”