It's a very good attempt...in fact why would we call it an attempt? An attempt implies that it's failed to some degree.

One thing though, on page 4...3 even, how did the wood get into the leg?? Also the sentence before that reads: "The driveway leads" where it ends abruptly.

For some reason you have chapter 2 leading directly on from 1 ending with: ' “Make sure you head straight here after school. I don’t think I can stay up too late tonight.” I say walking to the kitchen. ' and then chapter 2 again on the next page, but a longer version.

I have to say that for me it gives an insight into life as an American...if you get what I mean.

Btw, I've noticed that you seem to have soemthing about the name Jason...