Where the fuck did my subconscious mind altering ego go? I just can't figure it out at all. It is like it was here and then just up and disappeared. I hurried to the nearby Kwik-E-Mart, hoping to find the Pick of Destiny. Using it to scratch my balls, I made them grow ten times the size of an elephant. I started to freak out when I realized I needed some testicle cream. My balls were on fire; it was pure agony wrapped in bacon. The kind of bacon that is still hot and sizzling. The kind that's over-done and burnt to a crisp. Maybe I should eat some doughnuts. I found some chocolate eclairs at the local 7-11, so I ate two dozen and soon I remembered that I'm a fucking fat ass. What I also forgot was I'm disabled.

After exactly two hours, siamese twins and a midget went to that same 7-11 where Michael Jackson was hanging out. They quickly grabbed their Jesus juice and were on him faster than stink on a wet rhino's huge ass. Feeling a bit down about violently molesting Michael Jackson, they yelled ,"Jump in my belly!" Unfortunately, the massive cock-eyed witch Shaneequa Jackson, the forgotten Jackson, who was actually a Mexican belly dancer who posed as a Lucha Libre wrestler named 'I Drink Lots of Beer!' She had a giant gut that was shaped like a heart. It was truly disgusting. She proceeded to call her lawyer so she could sue...