Musing of a Voice

The hell? My point was that usually when I ask other people for opinions on my work, they don't give me anything I can work with, and this is not specific to this thread or forum. It's hard for an artist to find other artists to critique their work, and it's refreshing to find that here at Zelaron.

If you aren't going to give me any criticism I can work with about the poems I posted, please don't bother posting here.

Not a problem, Neko. It's nice to see someone actually respond positively to constructive criticism instead of assuming I'm attacking them.

Postcard bitter.
A leather bag in hand.
No one to love anymore.
Hollow-hearted in my bonecage.
Eyes a hazel empty ocean.
Postcard bitter.
Voice as raw as harmonica.
Blowing through the empty air.
Blue coat floating like a scissored cloud.
At my feet like ragweed.
Postcard bitter.
It's like raining in the desert.
To wait for your heartstrings.
Like blind David and dwarf Goliath.
Fighting, but not going anywhere.
Postcard bitter.
I'll drop it at your feet as I leave.
Face obscured by silk grass.
My mahogony lengths of hair.
My strife-sickened bitter face.
Postcard bitter.
Maybe you'll remember me.
On a day when you feel dead inside.
Like the way I was at your feet.
Like a servant for Prince John's mercy.
Rusty metal on my chipped fingernails.
Playing a song.
Postcard bitter.
Deaf by youth, death by shallowness.
Deep as a river of tear in a desert.
The kind of deep you can't see.
Not yet.
Postcard bitter.
See you later.