Anti "Anti-Do You Like Me" threads.

You sprayed a spider with cologne? Were you planning on taking it out to dinner and couldn't bear to walk into a fancy restaurant if your company stank of fly carcass? That's what I have to do to my younger brother sometimes. I tell him "look, we can't walk into Dairy Queen with you dressed in shortpants and stinking of baby-flesh. You march right into your room and change into that leotard, or so help me God, I'll scoop your eyes out with a salad tong. Not both tongs, just one. The one that looks like a big fork."

He usually complies after the tong threat. He hates that big fork. It scares him like fire scares Frankenstein.

Goodness. What have you done to the poor child that involved "the big fork"?

Heh...I think the better question is "what haven't I done?"

I hate the insect species in general. One time when I was working out in my garage, a fucking nat or some bug, flyies right into me eye. I had to go into the mirror and try and wash it out but it broke into pieces, so I had to get tweezers and pull the pieces out without pooking myself in the eyeball.

You sprayed a spider with cologne? Were you planning on taking it out to dinner and couldn't bear to walk into a fancy restaurant if your company stank of fly carcass?

How did you know my plans?!
Actually I didn't really want to kill the thing yet, just piss it off. Cologne has alcohol in it right? Alcohol generally pisses things off so I figured why the hell not? Obviously it worked because the thing jumped right onto my face.