Your favorite joke?

A guy comes home from work early to find his wife in bed with another man. Enraged, the husband grabs the other man and drags him from the bedroom into his garage. Once he gets the guy into the garage, he clamps the guy's penis in a vice and locks it. The husband then goes digging around in the back of the garage and comes back with a saw. Terrified, the man asks "Are you going to saw off my dick!?" "No" the husband replies. "You are. I'm going to burn down the garage."

Ooooold

Ooooold

Seconded.

Motion passed!

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One sunny day in Ireland, two men were sitting in a pub, drinking some Guinness, when one turns to the other and says "You see that man over there? He looks just like me! I think I'm gonna go over there and talk to him."

So, he goes over to the man and taps him on the shoulder. "Excuse me sir" he starts, "but I noticed you look just like me!"

The second man turns around and says "Yeah, I noticed the same thing. Where you from?"

"I'm from Dublin" came the reply.

"Me too! What street do you live on?"

"McCarthy street"

The second man replies, "Me too! What number is it?"

"162" the first man replies.

"Me too! What are your parents names?"

"Connor and Shannon"

The second man, almost dumbfounded says, "Mine too! This is unbelievable!"

So, they buy some more Guinness and they're talking some more when the bartenders change shifts. The new bartender comes in and goes up to the other bartender and asks "What's new today?"

"Oh nothing much, the Murphy twins are drunk again though."

lol. good joke, Lenny.

A little boy went to his father one day and asked him "Daddy, the kids at school were talking about vaginas. What is a vagina, daddy?" His father looked to him and said "Son...a vagina, before sex, is a like a beautiful, unopened rose. After sex, well...have you ever seen a bulldog eat a jar of mayonaise?"

That is disgusting.

Haha, that was pretty good.